Learn more about the Parallel Parenting Solution and maximize your private coaching and nervous system reset sessions with Love Life Coach Michelle Terrell.
Or this content can be used as a self-paced study guide, on your own to enhance the book "The Parallel Parenting Solution" by Carl Knickerbocker, "Say Goodbye to Crazy" by Tara Palmatier and "Will I Ever Be Free of You?" by Karyl McBride
Michelle and her partner have moved from post-separation abuse targets, during his custody battle, to parallel-parenting advocates and method instructors.
The foundation of the work is teaching about supporting core values and understanding boundaries.
The criteria that determine the need for a very clear parallel parenting plan, is all about whether boundaries are being respected or not.
This is the dividing line between a co-parenting arrangement that is cooperative and can evolve into any level of friendly involvement the co-parents may choose, and one that is toxic.
So teaching core values and the reality of boundary setting and keeping, it is the core principle-based series of lessons behind every successful escape from a toxic co-parent trap.
This course can be used by any parent experiencing a difficult break-up and challenging transition into a new relationship as co-parents with their ex.
These difficulties can be either due to the natural grief process that makes new arrangements strained and boundaries blurred for a time or for those situations where one parent is disordered and unable to move into a whole new set of parameters with respect and grace at all.
Healthy mature co-parents naturally do parallel parenting to some degree or another, whether they are aware of it or not.
They tend to have uncontested divorces, filing their paperwork themselves or via a neutral party paralegal. If they use an attorney, it is simply for convenience and to streamline the required process.
There is no family court trial drama and thus, no need to paint one another as the bad parent which can only serve to mire and stumble the efforts to build a positive, respectful co-parenting future.
They honor valid requests for new personal boundaries to be established and they use the same definitions for engagement that allow both parties to adjust to the new non-married relating arrangements.
This natural use of space and discretion is based on mutual respect for boundaries that can adjust over time, once sufficient healing has taken place post break up. This is co-parallel parenting at its best.
Other situations require strict and thoughtful adherence to parallel parenting guidelines because one party is co-dependant, trauma bonded and the other party is controlling, self-centered, disordered in their thinking, using a defensive and paranoid filter, has overstepped repeatedly, has gone out of their way to be hostile and they are unable to process emotions the way the average person can.
Whatever your case may be, learning more about navigating the high emotions and unprecedented anxiety and adversarial positioning that divorce, and even more so, the family court attorney-profit-driven system creates, is helpful and empowering.